Children’s privacy
How to keep a child’s Christmas list private
A guide for parents and guardians on sharing a child’s Christmas list with relatives while keeping it away from school chats, social media and strangers.
What a child’s list reveals
A Christmas list looks harmless, and to the family it is. But a child’s list can hold more personal information than it first appears: first name, age, clothing and shoe sizes, favourite characters, sports teams, school or club activities, and sometimes the town or neighbourhood from a photo in the background. Put together, that is a fairly detailed picture of a child.
Keeping a list private does not mean keeping it secret from the relatives who buy gifts. It means the list travels only to the adults who need it, through channels you choose, and does not end up in places where it can be copied or seen by people outside the family.
Keep the list in adult hands
The simplest rule is that a parent or guardian holds the list and shares it. Children can help write it, and should enjoy doing so, but the adult decides who receives it and how.
- Write or type up the final list yourself, even if your child drew or dictated the original.
- Store it in your own account, notes or a shared list tool you control, not a child’s device.
- Share it directly with each relative rather than in large group chats.
- Do not have children email, message or post their lists themselves.
- Leave out surnames, school names and addresses; relatives already know them.
Sharing with relatives
Relatives are the reason the list exists, so make it easy for them while setting a light expectation about keeping it within the family. A light, friendly request makes it easy for them to follow your lead.
You can send something like: “Here’s [child]’s list for this year. Please keep it within the family and don’t post it anywhere. If you want to check a size, message me directly.” That single sentence covers forwarding, posting and questions.
If some relatives are less comfortable with technology, a printed copy or private message may be better than a link they might forward by accident. For separated or blended families, agree between the households who shares the list with which relatives, so it does not get passed on in several directions.
School, clubs and other parents
Schools and activity groups sometimes run gift-related events, such as a class gift exchange or a letter-writing activity. It is reasonable to take part while limiting what the list contains.
For a class or club exchange, share only general interests, not a full list with sizes. For example: “Likes drawing, dinosaurs and the colour green.” If a teacher or coach asks parents to post children’s lists in a group chat or online board, it is fine to ask whether you can send it to the organiser privately instead.
When other parents ask what your child would like for a party or exchange, reply privately with two or three ideas rather than forwarding the whole list.
Social media and public posts
Posting a child’s list or letter can feel like sharing a sweet family moment, and the impulse is understandable. The drawbacks are that public posts can be seen and saved by people you do not know, stay findable for years, and combine easily with other details you have shared.
- Do not post a list that shows a child’s full name, age, school or location.
- Avoid photos where the list sits beside a school uniform, house number or street view.
- If you want to share the moment, share a cropped detail, such as a drawing, without names.
- Check your account’s audience settings before posting anything family-related.
- Ask relatives not to repost or reshare, even in private groups.
Letters to Santa
A letter to Santa can be more personal than a gift list. A child may write about siblings, pets, worries and what they hope for, in their own words. They deserve particular care.
If you keep the letter, store it with family keepsakes. If you want grandparents to see it, send a photo privately. If your child wants to mail a letter, check the current instructions published by your country’s postal service, and include only the information those instructions ask for.
Be cautious with websites or services that invite children to type a letter to Santa online. Read what information they collect and whether a parent is involved before letting a child use one, and never let a child enter a full name, address or photo without you.
What not to publish, anywhere
Some details should not be in a shared list at all, even one that stays with family, because lists get forwarded, screenshotted and printed.
- Full name together with birth date.
- Home address, school name or regular activity locations and times.
- Medical, developmental or behavioural details beyond a simple allergy note.
- Photos of the child attached to the list.
- Passwords, account names or gaming usernames.
Older children and teens
As children get older, their own sense of privacy grows. A teenager may not want siblings, cousins or certain relatives to see their list, and some items may feel personal to them. Respect that where you can.
Ask who they are happy for you to share it with, and share it only with those people. It is still sensible for a guardian to be the one who sends it, so that the list does not end up in a group chat with friends or on a public profile.
If your teen would rather receive money than items, that also reduces how much personal detail needs to be shared. If so, relatives only need to know that money is welcome and, if your teen agrees, what it is being saved towards. That is a short message, not a document.
If a list has already been shared too widely
If a relative has posted your child’s list or letter, ask them kindly to take it down. You might say: “That was lovely of you to share, but we keep the kids’ things off public pages. Could you remove it? Happy to send it to anyone who asks.”
If the list included details you would now rather not have circulating, such as sizes paired with a name and school, simply stop using that version. Write a fresh, trimmed list for the rest of the season and send it only to the relatives who are still shopping.
Once it is removed, check whether the post was shared elsewhere, and consider sending a short family-wide note for future years so nobody feels singled out.
Practical checklist
- Have a parent or guardian hold and send the final list.
- Remove surnames, school names, addresses and photos.
- Send the list directly to each relative, not to large group chats.
- Add a one-line note asking relatives not to forward or post it.
- Share only general interests for school or club exchanges.
- Keep letters to Santa private or share photos with family directly.
- Supervise any online letter-to-Santa service your child uses.
- Ask older children and teens who may see their list.
- Politely ask for public posts to be removed.
Frequently asked questions
Is it okay to share a child’s list with grandparents by email?
Yes. Send it directly to them, and mention that it is just for family so it is not forwarded on.
Should my child have their own account for a wish list?
It is safer for a guardian to manage children’s lists. A child can help choose items while an adult controls sharing.
Can I post a picture of my child’s letter to Santa?
If you do, crop out names, ages and locations and share it with a private audience rather than publicly.
What if another parent posts a class gift list with children’s names?
Message the organiser privately and suggest sharing interests without names, or sending lists individually.
Related reading
Written and maintained by the St. Nick's List editorial team. Spotted something wrong or out of date? Send a correction. Read how guides are researched, dated, and corrected.